Sunday, September 30, 2012

Somewhere in the middle of nowhere

Day 4

I was sad to leave KC. I mean who wouldn't be they have a restaurant that has a meat sampler platter! Roxie's vomit stopped that morning! Thank goodness because I couldn't thing of anything much worse than a car sick dog. As for Gunner he sort of ate. My theory he knew went went to Jack Stacks and was jealous.

After a delicious breakfast of really salty hash browns and yummy bacon we headed out to Omaha. For the record that was the BEST bacon I have ever had. I fancy myself a bacon expert so the Holiday Inn in KC gets 5 stars in the bacon department! Vomit free wash cloths not so much! I was very excited to reach Omaha because after all that is the second home for the Gamecocks!

On our way to Omaha, we drove through Leavenworth, KS. This is where Dave went to school and adopted Gunner. As we got close to the base Gunner started to get really excited. He was doing his "I am so excited, I am about to pee" whine. It appeared as though he was trying to tell Roxie but she was not getting it!

While driving through the post I got to see the Buffalo Solider monument. It wasn't until three days later I put two and two together that Bob Marley was singing about this solider in his song Buffalo Solider.

Dave pointed out where he went to school and it turns out the building now a parking lot. They did however build a new building. He was kind of sad because this is where Patton, McArthur, Eisenhower, Bradley and other famous Generals went to school as well.

I realized that I had ripped my pants leg. So I decided instead of throwing away my favorite yoga pants I would sow the hole shut. News flash- I don't sow, never learned, don't care too and have only sowed one other thing in my life. That time however was an extreme emergency. We popped into the PX and got a sowing kit. Who knew those kits were so involved. Dave asked me if it has black thread. My response- yes why do you ask? He said you are wearing black pants so you need black thread. Humm...never thought about the thread matching. I said good call. So as we continued to drive I began to sow my pants. Yep, the girl that doesn't sow is attempting to sow shut the hole in my pants. Oh and in case you didn't realize...I was sowing them while I was still wearing them. After a few sticks by the needle I saved the beloved yoga pants. It may have a Frankenstein seam but the pants will live again!

We made a couple of stops. One to see the Pony Express stables. I thought it was stupid to pay to go inside so, I just peaked in through the window I guess I should change my name again to "Peeping Penelope". While I was peeping in the windows I didn't realize the "museum" worker was staring at me while she was smoking a cig. Oops! We made our way to see where Jesse James was killed.

Somewhere in the middle of nowhere we spotted a truck hauling a Chick-fil-a sign. Well that was a most unfortunate event since that made both of us want some nuggets and waffle fries.

In Omaha we stopped by the old stadium where the college world series was played and then the new one. It was very cool! They even had a USC flag hanging up in the store.

For dinner that night we went to a little brewery and we actually got Cajun style food. I asked the owner if he was from the south he said no. He did thank us for liking the "heat" of the food. I guess in NE, Cajun heat is not fully appreciated!

Other happenings:

Roxie got into briars so...that was fun trying to get those out of her paws. (insert sarcasm)

A town we stopped in had a fund raiser that was "bacon dinner" why I have I never been invited to such an event?

Some cop pulled a smokey and the bandit move and went hauling around a truck on the entrance ramp to pull some car over.

More to come...

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Kansas City....Kansas City here we come

Day 3

We woke up to 43 degree temps. Really...43 degrees in September? This was a rude awaken to this southern belle which normally doesn't see temps like this until January. I guess the puppies didn't care to much for that either as they were very fast to potty. I waved to the friendly homeless man as we were leaving the park. I am pretty sure I was topic of his conversation that most likely went something like this "that girl picked up my pee cup."at least I could make them laugh.

So we loaded up the car and headed toward Kansas City. One thing I discovered is I would have a very hard time driving in MO. Why you ask...well they use letters for highway names instead of numbers. So you have to look for Hwy VV or something like that. Good thing Dave was driving or we might have ended up in Canada.

One of things I like to do is to read billboards. It keeps me from asking are we there yet and of course saves Dave's sanity. Between the billboard of "meth kills", "ABC adult super store" "Cracker barrel" and "McDonalds" I see one of the best ever. It was for Columbia College (the one in Missouri) it read "Support Cougar Athletics" and of course the very mature Creasmans busted out laughing. I am not sure if it was the "non traditional" age girl holding a basketball or cougar athletics brought up a whole other meaning but we must have laughed at that for about 10 miles.

We managed to make a stop for gas in Columbia, MO which was sort if funny because not only did UGA mange to kick some tiger butt USC did as well. Oh and to anyone that wants to know...Columbia, MO is not anything close to Columbia, SC!

We arrived in KC and Dave had the great idea of walking the puppies to this really cool city center called Country Club Plaza. This was the coolest little place. I managed to go into Tiffany's to drool over some bling.
In the plaza they had very cool statues. One of which was a wild boar. Roxie decided she would give her herding skills one more shot. The horse was a big fail so I guess she thought this would be a success. She growled, huffed, barked and eventually nipped it's heels. To her dismay that hog didn't go anywhere. Although she did prance away so I guess in "Roxie World" this was a big success!

Dave said a stop in KC is not complete without a stop at Jack Stacks BBQ. After he told me about a meat sampler platter of BBQ chicken, ribs, sausage and burnt ends I was sold. Let me tell you this was everything I had heard about for the past 200 miles. The waitress came to get out plates after dinner and her exact words were "I don't think you could have done more damage unless you licked your plate clean!" I am pretty sure that was a nice way of calling me a fat ass.

More happenings:
The bacon gravy worked!!! Gunner is off his hunger strike! Proof bacon cures everything!

Roxie puked! Yumm! Dave being the good person he is caught it in a washcloth. Warning if you are in the Holiday Inn in KC don't use the washcloths!

3...2...1 begin food coma!

Until next time day 4

Friday, September 28, 2012

Meet Me in Saint Louis

Day 2-

The day started very early that morning since neither myself, Roxie or Gunner particularly like or understand the time change. I do not agree with falling backward, springing forward or anything else for that matter because I have always needed and wanted sleep. Enough about my sleeping patterns. (They will make another appearance later).

So Dave went to get the car and I had the pleasure of taking a very excited Roxie and Gunner outside for pre-departure potty break. Well this proved to be more of a shake down of the valet parking attendant. Roxie thought the girl needed to give her kisses so she proceeded to pin this girl against the key holder. Gunner thought he needed to get in the action to help Roxie get her kisses and wrapped his leash around her legs. So there we all stood in streets of Nashville tangled up and trapped. Lucky for the girl her co-worker showed up to free all of us in time for Dave to pull up the car. I an pretty sure The Creasmans are now on "the do not stay" list at all A Loft hotel.

We all loaded up and headed to Saint Louis. Some where in KY I saw an El Chico restaurant which by the way was the same one found in Cola, SC. It made me want chips and salsa but since it was only 9:30 am and it was closed I had to settle for Panera. Don't get me wrong I am not opposed to eating chips and salsa at 9:30 a.m.

Later down the road Dave and I saw a sign that read "Giant Superman Statue" so of course logic says we needed to hunt that sucker down. Well little known fact this statue is in Metropolis,IL. First- who knew there was such a city, second- why is this not on the national registry, third- they need a bigger sign and fourth- that place was AWESOME! I mean in the town square was a giant Superman, a phone booth that of course I pretended to be Super Girl (I am not a dude) and cut outs that you could pretend to be both Superman and Super Girl. You may be asking yourself...did we take a pics as those charters...Duh of course we did! Pictures to follow!

Later in IL we drove through a dirt devil and no not the vacuum cleaner. Of course not being from those parts I had to goggle this event. Dave told me what it was so I could google. Basically it is a wind tunnel thing that blows around a bunch of dust and dried corn.

We made it into Saint Louis which I have not been since I was younger. Our hotel was about three blocks from Arch. There was a lovely park next to the hotel. I took the pups over there to walk around and of course Gunner pooped and I had nothing to pick it up with so I thought to myself just leave it. Well of course I couldn't for many reasons but one of the most important was the fact there were people around. So I found a cup and decided I would pick up the poop with that. BIG MISTAKE! That cup was filled with pee...the people looking at me strange were homeless folks. Yep...that's right I picked up a cup filled with a homeless person's pee! I vomited a little in my mouth and run into the hotel to scrub down. I told Dave and he said "What did you do that for?"

After that experience we took the pups to walk around the park by the Arch. Gunner had a wonderful time. He was tracking all kinds of things. Roxie had a lot of first...horse being one of them. She mustered up a bark that came from deep in her paw pads. She thought she was big and scary...the horse was unimpressed. He kicked his hoof at her. She didn't know what to do. I guess thoughts of Roxie being a real herding dog is over. On the way back to the hotel Roxie was heading toward a midget. Ok I an SCARED of midgets. No reason as to why but I an. I just knew she was going to be all over the midget. Luckily for me she was too busy barking at other things to notice the midget. Crisis adverted!

Later Dave and I went to have lunch/dinner at TGIFridays and we saw a big foul...a guy leaving a 1/2 empty drink on the bar. That is just so wrong! After dinner Dave and I had drinks at a roof top bar over looking the Cards Baseball stadium. It was really cool!

Other happenings:
Roxie developed the poops
Gunner is on a hunger strike that may or may not be ended by bacon flavored gravy.

More updates to come. Sorry for the delay...time changes kill me!

Monday, September 24, 2012

Shh...don't wake the chickens!

Day 1

The car was loaded up the night before except for a "couple" of bags and by couple I mean more like four. Two for me, one for the pups and one for Dave.  Yep that's right I was still cramming things into bags at the 11th hour.

So morning came, at least I thought it was morning because the clock said "am" however I have never gotten up that early.  The time you ask...4:00 a.m. Dave had already gotten up, made coffee, showered and finished packing the car before I even stumbled out of the bed room.  As I come walking down rubbing the sleep from my eyes I ran into Dave.  He said "You look tired" and I think I mumbled something about Diet Dew and ran into the bathroom door.  Note to self for the future...put on make up before Dave gets up and has coffee.  :)

The time to leave the beach had arrived.  Roxie and Gunner loaded into the kennels very easily. Well Gunner did...Roxie not so much as she had to be picked up and put in her kennel.  I guess she thought it was too early as well. After a little sob-fest with mom and myself and Dave standing in the driveway telling us both it was going to ok it was time to head out.  As we pulled out of the drive way I sobbed into a towel that was from the Carol Carols' house (Neechie we will return the towel in a few weeks).

The motion of a car has always put me to sleep.  Mom my used to put a cranky baby Stephanie in the car and drive me around the neighborhood until I feel asleep.  Fast forward to 2012 and I still fall asleep in the car.  I am sure that Dave is very thankful for a snoring Stephanie instead of a crying one.

Somewhere on I-20 I woke up just as we were passing a horse trailer, not a little tiny one but a big semi one. Well I guess the "rich" horses have a very different life than the common horses.  This trailer was bigger than some peoples houses.  As we pass the trailer there I was face to face with some dude in the back of the trailer.  NO not in the cab driving...actually standing in the trailer. We sort of gave a head nod to each other.  All I could talk about for the next 30 minutes is that guy. I had questions like did he have a chair to sit on, does it smell in there, does he get to get out. My mind still wonders about that little guy.

We made it to the mountains of NC and let me tell you that is some fun riding.  I felt like I was on a roller coaster.  If anyone has ever traveled through those mountains have been though the tunnel. So Dave says that he used to play this game when he was little.  What was the game you ask...to hold your breath while going through the tunnel and the person who does it wins.  So I took a deep breath and into the tunnel we drove.  Thanks to Dave driving fast because I might have passed out.  I am sure that I was getting ready turn blue.  As we exited the tunnel I said to Dave "I did it! I held my breath the whole time! What about you?" He responds "I didn't hold my breath...I was driving." So basically I sat there holding my breath for no reason...although I still won.

So somewhere in NC we realized that UT (Tennessee for the SEC illiterate) were playing at home.  We stopped at this lovely little truck stop just outside of Knoxville and there was this woman walking a bulldog that looked strangely like her.  Well to be nice to the dog he was way cuter then her and come to find out had a much better personality.  I have a staring problem so I just could not turn away and good thing I didn't.  Her husband/boyfriend/sucker was inside and she was standing outside trying to get into the car.  Next thing I know the guy walked out and the woman to the top of her lungs yelled "A-hole" (since this is a PG rated blog I can't type the whole word but you get the idea) where the F have you been.  His quite response was "Buying a power ball ticket, why?" I guess this was not the right answer as she went off like the atomic bomb! I guess she thought she was going to be late to the game that started a whole 10 hours from that very moment.  I have not heard if he won the power ball...I sort of hope he did so he could take the dog and leave that "B" in Knoxville.

We passed Oak Ridge, TN.  Dave said do you know what this is famous for.  My answer was the Oak Ridge Boys and I may or may not hummed the tune to Elvira. He said...."UMMM no that would be where they made the atomic bomb." Again in our family Dave knows war/Army stuff and I am the pop culture go to person!

We finally checked into the hotel.  Roxie and Gunner made their presence known.  I mean after all they are very cute fur babies.  Outside of our window were the AC and other vents.  Roxie decided that she wanted to give them the shake down.  She growled, ran to the door, growled, ran to the door...rinse and repeat. At 4 a.m. some drunk girls came home and Roxie was less than impressed.  I told don't get too annoyed that is normally your mom....to anyone that has ever stayed in a hotel where I have been on a girls weekend....I AM SORRY!

We went to dinner at a little brewery down the street from the hotel. On they way out we could hear Gunner screaming from the room.  Yep that is right we heard him all they way down the hall.  We were  only at the brewery for a bit however on the way out I saw some UGA fans so of course the obvious thing to do was to say "GOOOO DAWGS SIC EM" I was expecting a WOOF WOOF WOOF back but they sort of looked at me like I was on a daily pass from the crazy house.

We (well I was out cold by 8 a.m) Dave stayed up to watch the Dawgs victory.

Lessons learned:
Dogs in hotels suck.  They bark and growl at all kinds of noises
Carl Jr. is Hardees in the west
There are more strip clubs than Crapper Barrels (more on that topic on day 2)

Stay tuned....

Friday, September 21, 2012

Princess Procrastination

I am officially changing my name to Princess Procrastination.  I have always put off things to the last minute and packing is no different.  I am the type that will be tossing things into a suite case while the cab is in the driveway and this time proved to be no different.  The Army has efficiently packed up an entire house, loaded a truck and starting driving before I even decided what to bring. 

So there it was “P-Day” (packing day) which could only be described as a train wreck of clothes, shoes, not enough bags and wine.  To get a visual just picture Cookie Monster but replace cookies with clothes and shoes and you have me.  AAAAAGGGHHH!!!!

 In my head I thought I would have enough space for everything but I kept finding t-shirts and shoes that I could not live without.  So this packing picture which was nothing but rainbows and puppies (in my head) turned into a wine guzzling, tear fueled, clothes cramming train wreck.  I ran out of space in my bags (three to be exact) so Dave unpacked one of his so I could continue the cramming.  A bottle of “Hot to Trot” wine…no joke that was the name of the wine all of my things were packed and I use that term loosely since some of the bags are not fully zipped. 

Bright side of this small but Reality TV worthy moment is I provided Dave with an evening full of laughter.  He was still laughing morning as I wondered around the house looking for something to wear.  Yep that’s right ladies and gentlemen I PACKED EVERYTHING! So my “neatly” packed suitcases had to be “opened” so I could find something to wear to work today. 

Oh and don’t judge…I may have to wear this tomorrow as this is all I could find to match.  Well this dress and my PJs.  

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

T-minus 4 days and counting

Go West BELLE...go west! Ok so I took some liberty to that old saying but I think it works.

This southern girl is trading in flip flops, sweet tea and sun for rain boots, coffee and clouds. This exciting new adventure starts Saturday. Dave and I will pack up our two fur babies (Roxie and Gunner) and start the trek to Seattle. I can be thankful for a few things: comfy car with AC, sirus radio and hotels. I would not have liked to do this trip "Laura Igalls" style in a covered wagon.

Stay tuned to see where we will turn up next.